I am gathered here today to not only help you get through this thing we call life, but to show you how to get to a world of never ending happiness. No, you don’t have to call up that shrink in Beverly Hills – you know the one, Dr. Everything’ll Be Alright. Just call…the HYPHY WIFEY!
So put on your aprons and LET’S GET CRAZY with…
ZUCCHINI!!! And if you’re into optional ingredients, LET’S GET NUTS too!!!
quarter to scale
Zucchini is my go-to vegetable to grill in the summer. But you never, ever want to grill a zucchini this big. There’s too much water inside and they taste better when they are about a 1/3 of this size. The only thing to do with a large zucchini is to turn it into a baked good – or in this case – an edible!
I’ve used zucchini on the blog before in my Dirty Blondies, but the simplest way to use it is in zucchini bread. If you have a ton of zucchini leftover from your garden or CSA, make a bunch of loaves and you can stick them in your freezer for several months. People have been gifting me zucchini and squash all summer and I just couldn’t keep up with cooking them all. I knew I had to try out this sweet bread recipe when I was given this huge mofo!
And another friend gifted me this black cocoa! You can use whatever cocoa you have on hand though. Cocoa isn’t traditionally used in zucchini bread – a regular version would resemble banana bread more than anything. The cocoa completely changes this bread into a chocolate masterpiece.
My favorite kind of edibles are easy to travel with AND are discreet. Most of us want to go about our day and not worry about the judgement from others about our marijuana use. I usually make a version of zucchini bread or my Pot Pumpkin Bread about once a week. Just stick a slice in a Ziploc bag, drop it in your purse/bag and you’re on your way! It carries really well and lasts out of the fridge for at least a week. You can also store it in the fridge for a couple weeks.
Don’t worry about those bumps in the batter. It won’t be smooth because of all the zucchini chunks in there.
Holy cannoli, it came out so dark – the black cocoa is amazing! Reminder to myself to use this cocoa at Halloween for spooky cupcakes!
I wanted to show you a comparison of the color next to my brown wooden cutting board. Just look how dark it is from the black cocoa! And all that glorious water inside that huge zucchini is what makes it the moistest bread you will ever eat. This is what I call a “cheating” bread because it doesn’t actually taste like bread at all. This sweet bread tastes like chocolate cake without the frosting!
So hang tough children, eat a chronic slice and remember Prince’s words…”if the elevator tries to bring you down, go CRAZY – PUNCH A HIGHER FLOOR!”
Crazy Chronic Cocoa Zucchini Bread
(makes one loaf – about 10 slices)
1 1/2 cups shredded zucchini
1 cup white flour
1/2 cup cocoa powder, unsweetened
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon powder
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup canna-oil (click for my step-by-step recipe – try canola oil or vegetable oil for this bread)
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup chopped walnuts (optional)
1. Heat oven to 350°F. Grease or spray a 9×5 loaf pan with cooking spray.
2. Sift together white flour, cocoa, cinnamon, salt, baking soda and baking powder. Set aside.
3. In a separate bowl, combine canna-oil, granulated sugar, light brown sugar and vanilla with a mixer on medium speed. Add in shredded zucchini and eggs and combine until incorporated. (Optional) Combine walnuts and 1 teaspoon of flour together and stir into batter.
3. Slowly add dry mixture into the large bowl. Beat on medium speed until combined. Batter will be lumpy from zucchini.
4. Pour batter into a greased loaf pan and bake at 350°F for 55-65 minutes. Test with a toothpick until the center comes out clean. Cool in pan for 10-15 minutes before cooling on a wire rack. Wrap in aluminum foil to keep fresh on counter or store in fridge/freezer in a Ziploc bag or plastic wrap.
rest in power Prince